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Divorce as a Liberating Experience

Good and successful marriages enable spiritual growth of the partners as well as children. But many marital relationships are failures and have a very caustic effect on the spouses. They give rise to many negative feelings and leave the partners a nervous wreck. In these cases, divorce can be a liberating experience. It can unshackle the victim from the suffocating relationship and set him or her on a new path.

Personal Independence

Divorce offers you tremendous personal independence because all ties to your spouse are cut loose abruptly. You are your own boss and there is no one to question you about why you have come home late or where you have been all this while. Marriage is a relationship that is like a vehicle with two wheels, represented by the two partners. Both of them have to operate in tandem if married life has to progress smoothly. That is why marriage imposes not only certain rights but also obligations on the partners.

The husband and wife are duty-bound to not keep any secrets from each other and give mutual emotional support and nourishment whenever required. They consult each other while spending money and practise fiscal responsibility with regard to family finances. Also, the partners have a duty not to enter into any other romantic relationship and be loyal to each other as long as the marriage lasts.

With divorce, all these restrictions end suddenly. You are free as a bird and you are accountable to nobody in your personal affairs. You can hang out with friends late, go travelling to see the world, enter into as many romantic relationships as you want and flirt to your heart’s content without any feeling of guilt associated with it. The personal freedom granted by divorce liberates one from all responsibilities to another individual.

Financial Independence

When two people get married, their lives merge in every way – physical, emotional, social, legal and financial. The partners bring to the marriage all the assets they may already have accumulated over the years. If both of them are earning, they pool their resources. This kitty is used by them to save money for future needs and also to buy assets for the family, such as house, car and white goods. Quite a large chunk of a partner’s monthly income goes in meeting the expenses of the family and many personal aspirations remain unfulfilled.

With divorce, all your financial obligations to your spouse are dissolved. Now, none can stake claim to your money and you get to keep all your salary to yourself. You can spend as much as you want, no questions asked. All your savings remain with you for future use. People living alone are generally able to accumulate wealth much faster than the married couples. It is a great feeling to have access to all your money and savings exclusively for your own use. This financial independence is truly liberating.

Healing Process

Many marriages, though they start with a great promise, degenerate over time and become a living hell for a partner, either husband or wife. Often there is an element of physical or emotional abuse involved, sometimes with regard to the children too. A partner may be a control freak and dictatorial, making everyone’s day-to-day life difficult. Some spouses monopolise family resources and start hording money, leaving nothing for others. There may be frequent quarrels and shouting matches between the partners. This creates a lot of stress and anxiety in the house, with children suffering the most.

In such caustic relationships, a time finally comes when the victimised partner says enough is enough and walks out of the marriage by filing for divorce. After the split has been finalised, the healing process of the partner can begin. The source of all stress and anxiety is removed as the family disintegrates. The partner can then relax, join some leisurely activity such as sports or gardening and generally take it easy and recuperate from the ordeal. For those suffering excessively, some professional counselling can do wonders.

Start of a New Chapter in Life

Divorce is the end of an old and bitter chapter in life and the beginning of a new start with endless possibilities. The partner is now free of all responsibilities and obligations to the ex-spouse. He or she can choose to live alone or go for another romantic relationship. This is a chance not to repeat the mistakes of the past and choose the new partner wisely so as to have a fruitful and fulfilling married life.